I have this little blog for lots of reasons. Record, rant, rave, remember. And to be clever like I just was with writing all "r" words that totally worked. Thank you, I'll be here all night.
Tonight, I will rave.
I was flogged in the head with a sickness. Achy muscles, dizzy spells, head aches, tiredness and a throat trying to close up on me. A few days ago, I was woken up by Van at 5am for his self-appointed diaper change ("Mama, peeeeeeeeeee"), and as soon as I sat up, I knew I was screwed.
My husband was a really great help the first day, and then on the second day he sort of wasn't. But I have gotten over it, sort of. On the 3rd day, I knew Ethan was going to be gone because he had an event the next day. And I also knew I wouldn't be able to be a good mother. So I called my mother. She didn't answer, so I called my dad. And he said my mom was planning on coming to help me. She called me later and told me she was getting ready for the day and then she was going to come to my house.
When she came over, she jumped right into caretaker mode. She started some laundry, filled Van's sippy cup and ordered some lunch from a place that makes the most exquisite chips and salsa. Lunch was picked up and everyone was fed. I oddly got full really fast. I think that maybe after being sick and not eating barely anything for a few days, my stomach went back to default mode and was reminded that it isn't supposed to have a ton of food in it like I have been filling it with lately.
My mom then cleaned up and started getting more laundry washed and folded. And then I was told to go to bed. And I happily did. I got a good 2 hours of solid sleep in and woke up feeling much better. When I woke up, all three of my children were awake and taken care of. And the laundry was done.
She then made pancakes for dinner, which Jack said were the best pancakes he has ever had. Of course, she cleaned up dinner and then had me direct her in clean laundry placement in everyone's closets. Her last task was helping me straighten out my Christmas tree, which was incredibly crooked.
She left, giving all of us a hug and kiss and instructions to call her if I didn't feel well the next day.
That my friends, is what a mother does.
Guess what, you are never done being a mom. It isn't like your babies turn 18 and you breath a sigh of relief. You are still their mother. You are still supposed to love, support and serve. A mother's calling is never over.
I have some friends who do not have mother's like mine. After having babies, they don't have any help with their new bundle. They are left to figure things out on their own with a husband who is just as confused and scared. How could a mother abandon her own baby like that?
I don't say all of this so you can hate your own mother for not helping you in a difficult time. I say this so you remember to help your babies when they are adults. Life is hard, mothering is hard. But it doesn't have to be. So please remember when your children are grown that they still need help. And the good kind of help. Dishes, laundry, food, diapering.
The end. Amen.